Wednesday night on my way to church for my last praise team rehearsal, I accidentally took my usual route, forgetting that two weeks ago my usual exit was closed for construction. So instead of taking an alternate route I ended up having to drive about 4-5 miles out of my way. And as I turned the corner and drove down this strange road I realized why.
I was overcome with emotion. (That tends to happen when I’m driving.) I had to pull over, pause, take a picture and let my heart be filled. I don’t think I’ve ever been so scared and so worried about anything in my life as I am about moving to St. Louis, starting a new job and beginning my seminary education. I’m not having second thoughts; I’m not even worried that I might have made the wrong decision. I’m worried about how I will adjust, and how I will make a new and completely different life for myself. I will be desperate for my home, my friends, my family and the comfort my current life provides. I am worried I will let that become too much for me.
So basically, I just think the next two years will be too hard for me handle.
But then this rainbow appeared. It appear in front of me and all five colors were breathtaking and they disappeared up into the clouds. Then God reminded me that this next step is what he made me for, and the joy of what is to come rushed over me.
“Nothing worth doing is ever easy”, I wrote years ago in a goodbye letter. And for the last few weeks I’d forgotten that truth. I took the wrong way to praise team rehearsal because God wanted to remind me how much he loves me and how abundant his promises are. He will never leave me nor forsake me, though I’ve done that to him many times. His grace is enough to cover me…
And I will stand on that promise.
Can’t Take My Eyes Off of You
This was the best 4 minutes of my day.
I brought you in the world and I can take you out.
The corn.
The picture was my view as a child. I grew up on a farm, and spent my summers irrigating with my brother. I’d pick up irrigation socks, watch him fix pivots, and driving through corn fields like this one.
When the sweet corn was tasseled out and ready to be “put up” as my grandma would say, we’d gather all the neighbors’ kids and whatever cousins would be staying with us for the week and hop on the back of my dad’s truck with huge Rubbermaid trash cans. He’d set us loose in the field, with the object of filling up the trash can and dumping it in the back of the truck until it was full. Back and forth we’d go, racing to fill up the truck. Foxtails would stick to the bottoms of our jeans and socks, mud would cake our shoes, and the early morning breeze would keep us cool… but not clean.
I remember the smell of raw sweet corn… sweet and juicy. But the smell of the cornfield always made me sneeze and by the time the back of the truck was full I would be stuffed-up and miserable.
Dad would drive us back home after the truck was overflowing with picked corn. We’d sit on the edges of the pickup’s back end and we’d start shucking away, watching the husks and silk blow away in the wind. In the back of the truck we’d stay, until all the corn was shucked. Then I’d get stuck cleaning the corn in the ice cold water… brushing and scrubbing the silk away. (It drove me crazy!).
10 minutes of boiling and another 10 minutes of cooling later, the electric knife would come out, and the corn would come off the cob and be vacuumed sealed into bags for freezing. Piles and piles of bags are what I remember… and the smell of cooked sweet corn. And sticky hands. Really sticky hands.
I will miss the corn.
There’s a song that they sing when they take to the highway
A song that they sing when they take to the sea
A song that they sing of their home in the sky
Maybe you can believe it if it helps you to sleep
But singing works just fine for me