Category: reflection

of seasons and heartbeats

I had an online conversation lately with a few men who were sharing Spotify song lists for the Autumn season. I read in fascination how they described an emotional change that occurs when summer ends and Fall begins; how the music they listen to… Continue Reading “of seasons and heartbeats”


Sitting on the soft mound of dirt and sand, I carefully craved a long and narrow path with my hands in this sandbox. Digging deeper in some places, I created ups and downs for the water to flow. Then dragging the water hose over,… Continue Reading “sandcastles”

in the bleak midwinter

I’ve always been more comfortable in melancholy and sadness, more so that the average human being. It’s something that 2017 taught me to lean into more, but also be careful of, since it can lead to unhealthy ways of thinking and skewed perspectives on… Continue Reading “in the bleak midwinter”

woven threads

So I had to bake a peach pie.Those words came into my mind on my drive to work this morning. The trail to get there went something like this:Memories of feeling left out -> a chosen blog post -> a forgotten chosen blog post –… Continue Reading “woven threads”

of sorrow and joy [good friday hurts]

  There are many reasons Good Friday is a sad day for me.   It’s the day I lost my grandfather when I was 14 years old.   It’s the day my Savior died.   It’s the last day I spoke to one of… Continue Reading “of sorrow and joy [good friday hurts]”

on moving, goodbyes, and community

I went through those double doors for the last time, and briefly paused as I heard the glass door rattle behind me as they latched. From what seemed out of nowhere, my heart filled with sadness and tears threatened to brim over as I… Continue Reading “on moving, goodbyes, and community”

no longer and not yet

The last six months have been about the space between the “no longer” and the “not yet” for me. Have I honored that space? Not hardly. I screwed a lot of things up. Perhaps I handled it as best as I could have expected… Continue Reading “no longer and not yet”

a love letter to st. louis

For the past five years, I’ve viewed you as my home away from home. Which I realize doesn’t make a lot of sense, because I only lived with you for two years. I was a full-time student, working three jobs, living in a house… Continue Reading “a love letter to st. louis”

friendship and INFJs

INFJs don’t form a lot of close friendships in their lifetime… we are very selective. This isn’t about conceit, but really about knowing ourselves. We only have so much emotional energy we can give to another without great harm to our soul, so we… Continue Reading “friendship and INFJs”

i’m no good at this

I was spending some time talking with God last night, trying to make a decision. Not really an earth shattering one, but it kind of was. Because I knew that no matter what choice I made, it meant something was coming to an end.… Continue Reading “i’m no good at this”